THE CLASS OF 1987 ROCKED!!!

The son of a good friend of mine attended his first prom this weekend. Her hubby had to work, so I went over and took pictures with her. Another friend joined us and we had a few drinks as we commiserated with her on how her baby is growing up too fast. We assured her that he was a much better kid than we were at that age and wouldn’t be up to the crazy things WE did at our prom… (Turns out we were right, thank goodness!)

Due to the upcoming Blogstream Prom and Graduation, I already had my high school scrapbook out, so I took it with me. My friend took out her photos and we had a good time laughing at how goofy we were back then.

After a few more drinks, the pictures seemed sadder to me somehow. They seemed to mock me and remind me of all the dreams I had that never came true. All the potential wasted, chances never taken… It’s not the things I’ve done that I regret the most, it’s the things I DIDN’T DO that I regret…

I remember in college, on the day that I was moving out of the dorm, a guy that I had known for about two years stopped me in the stairwell. “Hey Annie, hold up a second. I may not get another chance alone with you to tell you goodbye. There’s something that I’ve always wanted to do…” Then he grabbed me by the shoulders and kissed me. A long, soulful kiss that I will never forget. Then the moment was gone, we said goodbye and I never saw him again. If he had never kissed me, I probably wouldn’t have remembered much about him. He was just a guy from college, a friend that I hung out with sometimes. But now I remember him not only as being a really good kisser, but for his courage to act. I want to be like him. I’m tired of being sad and angry all the time.

Looking at the old pictures brought up so much sadness and anger. It made me sad for the girl I used to be. It made me angry at all the people that kept me from my dreams. But the truth is that it’s me that I’m most angry with. I’m tired of feeling sorry for myself. I don’t want to live anymore swallowing compromise after compromise…

So, no more pity parties! That was the last one. I’m doing everything I possibly can right now to make my dreams come true. I should be proud of that.

Now I just need to work on forgiving myself for making all those compromises in the first place. And I need to stop directing so much anger at my husband. It’s not his fault if I’ve made any compromises for him. I have free will. I can’t change the past, but I have the ability to make my own decisions now and for the future…

So, here’s to the class of 1987 and the silly, arrogant, optimistic girl I used to be! No one captures that time better than 1985 by Bowling For Soup…. (It probably fits my friend’s life even more than mine…) And I don’t care what anyone says, the eighties did ROCK!

- A.

1985
By Bowling for Soup

Debbie just hit the wall--
She never had it all.
One Prozac a day,
Cause Ben’s a CPA.
Her dreams went out the door
When she turned twenty four.
Only been with one man,
What happened to her plan?

She was gonna’ be an actress,
She was gonna’ be a star.
She was gonna’ shake her ass
On the hood of White Snake’s car.
Her yellow SUV is now the enemy.
Looks at her average life
And nothin’ has been alright
Since…

Bruce Springstein, Madonna
Way before Nirvana
There was U2 and Blondie
And music still on MTV.
Her two kids in high school,
They tell her that she’s uncool,
Cuz she's still preoccupied
With 19, 19, 1985…

Woohoohoo
1985
Woohoohoo

She’s seen all the classics
she knows every line
Breakfast Club, Pretty in Pink
even Saint Elmo’s Fire
she rocked out to wham
not a big Limp Bizkit fan
thought she’d get a hand
on a member of Duran Duran

Where’s the mini-skirt
Made of snake skin?
And who’s the other guy
That's singin’ in Van Halen?

When did reality
Become T.V.?
Whatever happened to
Sitcoms, game shows…?

On the radio was…

Bruce Springstein, Madonna
Way before Nirvana
There was U2 and Blondie
And music still on MTV.
Her two kids in high school,
They tell her that she’s uncool,
Cuz she's still preoccupied
With 19, 19, 1985…

Woohoohoo

She hates time,
Make it stop.
When did Motley Crew
Become classic rock?
And when did Ozzy
Become an actor?
Please make this
Stop, stop, STOP!

And bring back…

Bruce Springstein, Madonna
Way before Nirvana
There was U2 and Blondie
And music still on MTV.
Her two kids in high school,
They tell her that she’s uncool,
Cuz she's still preoccupied
With 1985…

Friday, April 28, 2006

FIVE THINGS I’M GRATEFUL FOR THIS FRIDAY

1. Caffeine
2. Retractable Dog Leashes
3. Sticky Notes
4. The smell of a brand new book
5. Girls Night Out

WHAT DOES YOUR FRIDGE SAY ABOUT YOU?

As I was reaching in the fridge this morning for my daily Diet Dr. Pepper, it struck me that a person’s refrigerator says a lot about them. Not just the items they have inside, but also what they choose to stick to the outside of it. It’s a giant magnet—how cool is that?! Most of us can’t resist the urge to stick SOMETHING on it…

So here’s what’s INSIDE my fridge: (Keep in mind we go to the store on Saturday, so it’s getting pretty lean…)

• Mostly drinks: soy milk (I know it’s sort of nasty, but I’m so proud of hubby for drinking it, because it’s good for him—I will only use it on my cereal), iced tea (sweet), diet Dr. Pepper, Dasani, Godiva liqueur, margarita mix
• Condiments galore: pickles (bread and butter, dill, and sweet relish), 4 kinds of mustard, ketchup, salad dressings (Ranch, Italian, French, Thousand Island, and Raspberry Vinaigrette), variety of hot sauces (Picante sauce, Texas Pete’s, and taco sauce), tartar sauce, soy sauce, sweet and sour sauce, A-1, Worcestershire sauce and a variety of marinades, Hershey’s chocolate syrup in the squeezable bottle
• Bagels, cream cheese, butter, eggs, block of parmesan, pepperoni, a couple of Lunchable’s, apple slices, a tangerine, half an onion and some garlic cloves
• Freezer side: chocolate almond ice cream, tilapia, peas, broccoli, corn, and tequila

And here’s what’s on the OUTSIDE of my fridge:

• Scooby, Shaggy, Velma, Fred & Daphne magnets from Scooby Doo
• Three different pizza place magnets (hubby loves pizza, can you tell?)
• A little red wine bottle magnet from Napa Valley
• Magnet from the vet
• Conversion and substitution chart for common kitchen ingredients
• Christmas pictures of my niece and nephew and all my friends’ kiddos (there’s about 15 of them and they take up the freezer side door)
• A little sheet my mom gave me that says “Things We Can Learn From Our Dogs”

Hmmm…that DOES say a lot about a person, doesn’t it?

Ok, now it’s your turn…!

- A.

Thursday, April 27, 2006

So here’s a question…

If I act like Dogbert and wave my paw at people who don’t think like me, can I really call myself a tolerant person? Here are I am, ranting about how intolerant our country has become… Yet I feel totally justified in calling those who I deem intolerant “ignorant fools.”

If a person is intolerant of intolerance, can they really call themselves tolerant? Or is it okay to be intolerant of intolerance? I’m having a hard time coming to terms with my own answer to that.

I believe in my heart that all human beings have the potential to help or harm, and that most of us do a little of both through out our lifetimes. We’re not one-dimensional beings that can be defined simply by a set of beliefs. We’re a composite of our experiences, memories, thoughts, words, actions and non-actions. Every day is a new day to help or harm.

Still, I struggle with my own intolerance. That old paw seems to wave all on its own! There are certain things I just can’t find it in my heart to be okay with. Guess I still have some evolving to do…

- A.

I've had this on my office bulletin board for years and years. Of course I'm MOSTLY joking, but it seems to fit so many situations, don't you think?



- A.

MillionForMarriage

MARRIAGE EQUALITY

Gay people deserve the same right to be miserable as the rest of us sad sorry married saps. I’m paraphrasing a line from Chris Rock, (and not very well, he is much funnier), but I believe in the sentiment 110%. Seriously, though, I may not always be thrilled with my own marriage. In fact, there are days I’m not even sure the institute of marriage is meant for me. But I believe that everybody should have the option of deciding that for themselves.

How people can think that they have the right to tell someone else who they can love totally floors me. Finding love is hard to do. Finding your soul mate, someone you want to spend your life with, is rare and wonderful. We should celebrate and congratulate anyone who finds that, not make laws to prevent it!

So let’s say you have some twisted sense of “morality” that causes you to believe that homosexual love is “wrong.” Hey, this is America. You have the right to be an ignorant fool and far be it from me to stop you. You have the right not to be in a homosexual relationship or associate with those that do. But you do NOT have the right to limit other people’s rights!!!

How would you feel if the person you loved for 50 years were in the hospital and you had no right to be involved in their treatment or even visit them?!!

How would you feel if the kids you raised were at risk of being put in foster care if something happened to your spouse because you suddenly had no “legal” rights to your own children?

How would you feel if the health insurance you’ve been paying for your family became invalid because some intolerant assholes decided to pass an amendment to the constitution legalizing discrimination?

I’m sorry, I’m getting a little emotional. I know that cursing and trying to shame people that don’t agree with me does nothing to strengthen my case here. But it just really pisses me off that the government I had so much faith in when I was young is actually trying to pass an amendment (called the Federal Marriage Amendment) that will discriminate against many of our citizens.

I’ll be honest. I never paid much attention to government and economics in school. I stopped watching the news years ago. I always found it overwhelming and depressing. I thought there was nothing I could do about it all anyway. Well, guess what? I’m paying attention now. And there ARE things I can do. Things YOU can do.

A friend told me about the Human Rights Campaign Foundation. You can go to their site and find out more about the Federal Marriage Amendment and what people are doing to fight it. With one click of a mouse, you can sign an online petition supporting equal marriage rights for everyone. I signed the petition and if you feel like I do, I hope that you will too.

ONLINE PETITION TO SUPPORT MARRIAGE EQUALITY FOR EVERYONE: www.MillionForMarriage.org
MillionForMarriage

HUMAN RIGHTS CAMPAIGN FOUNDATION: www.hrc.org
HumanRightsCampaign

Here are some blurbs about the Federal Marriage Amendment from the Human Rights Campaign website:

“The Federal Marriage Amendment is discriminatory.
It is wrong to single out a group of Americans for second-class status.”

“The Federal Marriage Amendment undermines the Constitution.
The Constitution should expand freedoms for Americans, not limit them.”

“The Federal Marriage Amendment is not what Congress should be focusing on. Between the war in Iraq, rising health care costs and the continuing threat of terrorism, Congress has much more important things that it should be dealing with other than a constitutional amendment banning marriage between same-sex couples.”

So there’s my soap box for the week. If I’ve offended anyone it was unintentional. But if I’ve encouraged anyone to act, it was worth it.

- A.